Making it easy for everyone to nurse: Carnival Day 2

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about baby friendly communities. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st! 

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Let me start by saying that my experience with early nursing varied SO greatly with my two daughters merely because they were born in two different countries. My first daughter was born in a country where women publically nurse. . . . older children. . . . and talk about nursing. . .two children AT THE SAME TIME. And I did not value this way of life, of mothering, of focus on breastfeeding, and never letting babies cry. I thought it was backwards, and I was going to stick to my "American culture" by doing it the "American way." I was going to nurse my baby for 6 months, I was horrified at the ideas of nursing older children, tandem nursing, or having my baby (kids) sleep with me past that same time period. Kids should be told NO and they should learn to self soothe and they shouldn't always be picked up. And then, at the magic SIX MONTH mark, our family moved back to the US, and still, I was seeking a group of mothers who were counter-culture, but this time, they were counter-culture to the American way, and in so many ways, mirrored the mothering ways of the country I'd just left. Funny the journey motherhood takes you on isn't it?

And the reason I share some of that background is because when breastfeeding started to become an important part of my life, when sharing breastfeeding information, educating women on the subject and myself as well, all became part of my LIFE, of my MOTHERING and of my PURPOSE. . . . I realized that positive things about breastfeeding that had been said to me, the gifts of encouragement that I hadn't taken to heart in the moment, the little reminders along the way that I was a loving mother to my baby girl.

When my daughter was just DAYS old, we happened upon a group of friends sitting in the park, while walking home. All were mothers, veteraned mothers, of multiple babies. When they saw that my little one was crying and wanted to nurse, they invited me to sit with them for a while and nurse her before continuing my walk home. I declined . . . I had been nursing this baby only a few days, it was not yet something SUPER comfortable or normal for me. . . but I did end up CARRYING my 6 day old baby half a mile home instead of leaving her to cry in the carseat/stroller. On another occasion, a friend told me that I was "so smart the way I breastfed my baby," because I would sit cross legged and prop my arm on my leg and my baby's head on my arm (in such a way that I didn't have to just hold her suspended, tiring out my arms and back, etc). I'm not sure now if she was complementing my "form" because she hadn't done the same, or because I was "kaivalagi" and she didn't know American women knew anything about breastfeeding (if that's the case, so sad that in the eyes of other cultures we have lost the ART of breastfeeding as American women). Thinking back on that invitation and then that comment, these were all building blocks that made it easier for me to nurse in public.

Then I joined a community of breastfeeding advocates. Of LACTIVISTS. Of women (and their families) who don't just want to normalize breastfeeding, but want to make it "ho-hum ordinary." And the knowledge and understanding and encouragement that I have felt during these past 3.5 years as part of that community, have made it easier for me to nurse in public. To want to pass that image on to my daughters, my family, my husband's family, my friends, younger women I might mentor and even mothers I do not know.

And so perhaps it is not the location, or the staff, or the accomodation that makes it easy for me to nurse, but it is the knowledge that by nursing my babies where others MIGHT see, I am saying that this is important, so important, important enough for me to do without worrying what others might think. I am not nursing to make a statement, I am not publically nursing to offend, I am publically nursing because, for me, and my family, it is NORMAL, it is ORDINARY and it is EASY!!! (And it should be for EVERYONE).

 

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 Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

• Emily @ Baby Dickey—baby eats when baby wants: nursing in public
• BoobiesNBabies @ Num In Mind—NIP a Lil Giant, How We Do It
• Sylko @ Chaotic Mama—Breastfeeding Carnival: Nursing in Public


• Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—My Biggest Advocate


• Timbra @ Bosoms and Babes—Making it easy for everyone to nurse


• Kaitlin @ Bringing Birth Home—Breastfeeding Uncovered - A Peaceful Protest


• Claire @ Geeky Gaming Mama—Nursing in Public: What Makes it Easier


• Brooke @ Milk Maid Mama—Nursing in Public


• Kathy @ Musings From an Arid Neverland—Do I need fancy clothes to nurse in public?


• Shary @ Mama Fish—NIP: Nursing in Public


• Kimberly @ Monkey Tales Mama Thoughts—Nips: Not those, well kind of those


• Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Breastfeeding Public


• Sarah @ Most Revealing—Nip


• Renee @ Just the 5 of us!—No Reservations


• Natasha @ Natural Urban Mamas—Nursing in Public-Not a Big Deal


• StorkStories @ Stork Stories... Birth & Breastfeeding—Little Old Men… & Nursing in Public (Back by “PUBLIC” Demand)


• And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Heather Hendriksen—Tips for Nursing in Public